Aaaah! New Career Thought

Okay, this is the part of me that I put into my info. The part where I get a new idea, go crazy with it, then give up when it starts getting too hard. But I do not want to give up this time! I am determined to make it work until I've bled! No, just kidding. I mean, make it work until it's either my career or I've decided that I don't like it (and not because it's too hard). I'm twenty-one and need to stop being such a baby about things and take some chances! It IS scary right now because of the lack of jobs and money not going around like it use to, but I just need to get over that fear of being broke. Because I wont be! I'll rich in happiness from doing things I've wanted to do!

^^^^ Doesn't that sound like half pep-talk half scared shiz-less?

Anyways, the other day I was helping a girl on a forum find some knee high socks with baby blue ribbons on them. When I asked her what they were for she said she was being a 'magical girl' to an anime/gaming convention she was going to. She showed me the shoes she had picked out, probably the cutest shoes I've seen. When I explained that I loved putting outfits together and that I use to make costumes for a play, she enlisted my help in finding a dress/top to go along. It took a few days of squealing and giggling and admiring until I stumbled on this one and she was in love.

Well searching and sharing, her and I started talking about how cool Gothic Lolita and regular Lolita is. Lolita is a cutesy, Victorian style, made most popular in Japan. Girls often wear dresses with bows and ruffles glamour! (Bet my step-dad wishes I had wanted to be Loli while growing up ;]) Anyways, searching, searching, searching, critiquing. I started to see how some dresses where so simple and then just dressed up with lace, bows, over coats, corset like ribboning. My sewing eye had been caught! I desperately wanted to make something. I wanted to save forty bucks on a dress that I could make myself.

That's when I got to thinking. Hey, these people on eBay make about fifty and up on one Loli-Goth dress (not accounting for the really detailed ones running at about 160) and it isn't even that complicated looking. I could do it. I could do it and sell it.

I want to make some dresses like these and try my hand at some eBay. I've thought about it a long time, it's always been in the back of my mind, I just figured it would be a side hobby while owning my own clothing store someday. But now, while I'm trying to earn money for the summer so I can spend it (the summer, not money) how I wish... Why not now? Why not NOT just a hobby? What's stopping me?

Broken sewing machine
OLD sewing machine
Proper lessons
Money to start such a large investment

Let's define these.
Broken and OLD can go together;
My sewing machine is seriously so old. I think it must have survived the 50's or something. It's a nasty tea-tan color (not that looks matter, just sewing most machines are white now) and is insanely dirty on the inside. The bobbin gets ratted up underneath and tangled in the top-stitching causing me to get frustrated, annoyed, and in the end, defeated beyond recovery. I can only use 1 out of the 10? settings it has thanks to the feet being lost for good. Did I mention it wobbles? Yeah, it lost a part of the cover and now is recklessly unbalanced unless I put something under it. And I believe I am down to my last needle. All of these things CAN be fixed, for a price, but in the end... I would just like a sewing machine that can do it all and not fight with me. Is that too much to ask?

Problem resolve?:
Buy a new one. I have been wanting a new one ever since I learned how to sew. My teacher had this really cool computerized one that did just about EVERYTHING. It even threaded itself. How amazing is that? I've just been too chicken/lazy to buy a new one. I'm afraid of getting one and having it torture me. Or getting one and it breaks down (taking things back is such a pain in the arse). But I do believe it is time to invest in the sewing machine of my dreams! Now if only I could test drive them all... I've been reading this blog called A Dress A Day on picking out the right one, so hopefully I wont make a mistake! Sigh.

Proper lessons:
I've had minimal lessons on sewing and basically just winged it most of the time. So depressing. This and the broken machine are what always made me give up right away. I suppose the fact that a straight line is difficult for me to achieve was the best discouragement ever!

Problem resolve?:
I'd like to take sewing lessons again. I want to learn all the things I never knew and even the things I've already learned. I am going to see if there are any summer lessons at the college up here IF I get a new machine during the summer. Easy problem fix!

Large investment:
This would be an extreme invest to me. Almost like my apartment was. The only difference is that I was working then and I don't plan on selling my place on eBay (tempting!). I have always been really careful with my money. I rrarely buy things for myself and when I do, it's usually full of regret as they ring it up and ask for my cash. However, I always end up glad I spent the money, it's just getting past the small road bump tummy feels sick sort of feeling.

Problem resolve?:
...Suck it up and put out. ;] The cash that is. Hopefully in the long run, I will be earning every penny back with my fashion sells. It's just that first leap that scares you (well, all leaps scare me! I hate falling). But I want to do this. I want to give it a chance.


Who knows! If I end up really liking making Loli-dresses than I might expand from eBay and start my own official website and business. Siiiiigh. *Daydreaming*

Anyways! Until then, I shall just start with the simplest things to do first.... Buy my own Loli-dress and study up on the fashion and get me a new machine!